Placing me

Dust hadn’t even settled yet

the ring still reverberating

an old laughter smelling of naphthalene

a corpse collapsing

a new shadow in yours

time

just a social construct not applicable to you

you said it just happened

I was the shy 5 years old again

hiding from you

you left me with your discarded companion

and fate laughed at me

when he found himself in a younger bed,

hoarding a pine tree to safety

a pixel heart still pulsating next to my name

a well known pattern

so when that bench was breaking under our weights

I could already see new dents in your skin

from lighter fingers

sweat on your glasses

the eternal replacement

I looked down where my soles

were stepping on childlike hurt

but as social construct kept running

I found vocal chords to start a new thread

no more an observer, a passive tense,

youthfulness escaping from my soft lines

to allow skin on skin

without trying to find an anchor

but merely the delirium of desire

my bed suddenly looking too small for two

the need to be remembered

left on those country lanes

on a train to Manchester

on a canal mingling with your anxiety

no more something to hold

but rather something to let free.